Ebay...

DOES NOT LIKE ME!  Urgh!  I keep losing my bids on Ebay.  It's getting quite ridiculous.  First computers, now clothes.  I have to say, it drives me into an insane emo-rollercoaster.  When I see something I like, I get super duper excited, so of course I bid.  I am an impulse buyer by nature, so OF COURSE i'm going to bid when I see it!  For the life of me, I cannot watch something until the last minute to make my bid.  People tell me that's what I am suppose to do, but my fingers think otherwise.  Then when I get out-bidded, sometimes I'll fight bc I really like it so I keep bidding...way beyond its value.  But I guess that doesn't matter because I never win anyways. Disappointment followed by determination, and eventually, egotism prevails.  But no matter how long I fight in these individual Ebay battles, I ALWAYS lose.  This last bid was on a Balenciaga tank with lace and I was the highest bidder until the last 45 seconds!  As I was freaking out and trying to re-bid, the damn auction ended.  Overcomed by extreme sadness, I have decided I will never be able to assimilate into the Ebay culture.  My over emotional personality + my impulsive behavior has forever outcasted me in the world I so want to belong to.  

I want to hire an ebay bidder like I want to hire a chauffer for the rest of my life.